My happiness is not dependent
September 10, 2012, 4:56 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I recently realised something beautiful, something pretty obvious, but the realisation sunk a little deeper. My happiness is not dependent.

I recently unexpectedly engaged myself in a relationship. I love the relationship. I love her, miss T. She’s so beautiful and so are our moments together. But I don’t need her to be happy. If she walks out I’ll hurt, oh yes I will but I’ll be fine. Haha! The implications of this insight are even more beautiful – Because I have nothing to lose I can simply relax in all moments, I don’t have to put in effort to do or say the right thing in order to get approval. I can just be me! Relaxed in my own truth, and love and serve from that space. Beautiful! I hope I can keep this insight with me in moments to come.

The insight arose in a meeting with her recently. I wanted to talk about something but I hesitated because of the sensitive nature of the topic. But soon I realised I’ve got nothing to lose – all I have to offer is myself, my naked truth, so let it show! – so I went for it.

Yesterday I also realised that the insight also applies for other aspects of life, such as work. I don’t need my job! Haha, so while I will not slacker off or not do my duties, I can still stand firm for myself, not be overly accomodating for others. I don’t need to be afraid of losing anything because there is nothing to lose! Again – relax, act out my space of truth and alignment..! 🙂

Friends – no reason to adjust my behaviour to meet what I think are their expectations of me (how silly!!). Contrarily, no reason not to just let my whole self show, relax into myself. Those who don’t like it, I leave them be.

That will be my practice ahead 🙂

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